Grunts
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Finished on: Jul 13, 2024
ibsn13: 9780451454539

“You can’t beat no orc marines

When we fire our M16s!”

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Mary Gentle’s Grunts in a nutshell. Grunts is a satire of the schlocky high fantasy Tolkien ripoffs of the 70s and 80s. It pokes fun at the aesthetic of the American military as portrayed in film and literature. It combines Grand Guignol (think slapstick but extra gory and violent) dark comedy with satire on bad fantasy.

The story begins with a group of orcs, the Agaku led by the orc Ashnak, tasked with stealing powerful yet non-magical weapons from a dragon’s hoard by the nameless necromancer. The pretense for this quest is that these weapons will be useful for the Final Battle between the forces of Light and Dark that’s about to happen.

These weapons turn out to be an impressive assortment of modern military equipment: assault rifles, machine guns, rocket launchers, tanks, helicopters, surface to air missile launchers…

You name it, they’ve got it.

The Agaku are your stereotypical generic fantasy orcs: a little stupid, violent, strong. The dragon’s hoard of modern military weaponry was cursed with a geas which changes the mindset of the orcs into the stereotypical Vietnam War United States Marine Corps soldier mindset: huuuuuurrah-ing, tabbaco chewing, cigar smoking, a belief that might makes right, etc.

Hijinks ensue.

Minor Spoilers Ahead

It turns out that the modern military equipment the orc marines have access to isn’t enough to turn the tide of the Final Battle. The forces of Light win but many of the forces of Dark, including Ashnak and his orc marines, manage to escape. The orc marines return to their fort in Nin-Edin.

In the following weeks, the forces of Light chase down and ethnically cleanse (we’ll get into it) the remaining forces of Dark. This leads to a siege (take a shot every time Mary Gentle depicts a siege in her work) where Ashnak and his orc marines have dug into their fort at Nin-Edin and are preparing to fend off the forces of Light.

Note that all this happens in the first third of the novel, subverting the trope of the not so final Final Battle.

Let’s talk about the forces of Light. Epic fantasy has always had a problematic relationship with presenting good/bad in black and white terms with little room in between. My understanding is that this simplicity appeals to the human desire to constantly simplify the eternally complex real world in order to live within it.

That’s fine. But by presenting good/bad like this, it’s easy to fall into the trap (intentionally or not) of depicting certain beings as inherently evil.

Dehumanizing the human.

Mary Gentle portrays the forces of Light and Dark….

posits that the weapons we have access to change us (power corrupts), she posits that power is power and war is war,

… fantasy satire with grit. Think Terry Pratchett but more mature and with a lot more gore and violence.

….

themes to explore: ethnic cleansing, rnd orc with gold eyes (1/8th elven)

Kicking off the book with the “nameless necromancer” completely wasted on wine, sending off one of his orc captains on a quest of some sort was a great way to start.

I think this is going to be a goldmine for fantasy roleplaying ideas…

“Ned and Will Brandiman,” Ned introduced. “Notorious ‘alflings. Sir and madam, you are looking at two of the greatest professionals it will ever be your good fortune to meet. As to what we do, we find lost property.”

Shazgurim snorted. “And is it usually lost before you two ‘find’ it?”

“Now that you come to mention it…”

Ashnak nodded his great tusked head. “Thieves. Our master the nameless said there would be thieves.”

“We prefer the term adventurers. It sounds so much more respectable.” Will brushed himself down and strolled across the dip to look at the ransacked chests. “You realise it will be necessary to return the tools of our trade? And, now I come to think about it, we have no transport. I think it would probably be advisable for you to detail one of your warriors to carry these chests for us.”

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